Sept. 16 9:14 AM
5 shots of Henny in and still no work from you. I called at 12:21 and 1:21.
I cried all night for you wishing you can be next to me. I cried because you aren’t the same. It’s like I don’t know you anymore. I thought it was you going to Ze’s house earlier, waiting till midnight to surprise me.
The tears finally stopped around 2 AM and I told myself we had a good run. To embrace what we have and let things come naturally. I smiled at the memories we had, and the much more I am hoping will come. The “it will get better” that you said.
I finally went to bed at 3 AM and woke up half an hour later to call but still no answer from you. At least the phone isn’t dead.
It’s 9 AM now and I have been up since 6 AM. I called you at 7 AM no answer. I called again and after two rings, voicemail, meaning you rejected my call. I wonder where you could be. At another one of your boys house?
While I am sitting and waiting for you. Hoping it’s you every time a car drives by with music blasted, or the screen door opening. But in actually it’s my neighbors. When I leave my room, I always look at the door hoping you would be there.
The crazy thing is, I don’t need you. I don’t need you for anything. I just want you. Can’t you see that?
I can see why Kc and Jo Jo made that song Crazy because I am really going crazy just thinking about you.